The Nowhere Near Complete Cast Page (last updated November 2004)

Josquin— 34 year old musician living in Melbourne Australia. Skeptical of astrology but fits the cancerian mould suspiciously well. Except for the mama’s boy bit. Could do with a visit from the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy fellas, especially if they paid for all the new clothes.

Marion— My lovely girlfriend. An expert at German, history, making chocolate cakes, dancing, and of course being ravishingly gorgeous.

Eden— good friend and confidante. We dish up all the dirt on our sex lives, which always makes for a good coffee or beer together.

James— Eden’s boyfriend, another musician. The more I get to know him, the more I like him. Ex-boyfriend of Sarah below.

Henry— My good friend who introduced me to coffee. Now studying arcane things at Cambridge.

Carlie— Henry’s girlfriend, although I knew them both before they got together. In fact they were housemates before they became an item. She’s a fantastic musician and most excellent person.

Naoyuki— My Japanese (didn’t see that one coming, did you?) (now ex-)housemate. We got on fine, and have a compatible tolerance of mess.

Tiff— Ah... the ex. The one I think about a lot. I know it’s naughty, and I know I’ll stop doing it when I’m distracted by the loving of another fine woman. Am pleased to say that I’ve found that fine woman and am thus over Tiff.

Saffron— (not the one that got married) a fascinating girl who has no idea of how beautiful she is. If she became an actor she could be the next Cate Blanchett for sure. Have I mentioned that I was at Melbourne Uni at the same time as Cate Blanchett? And somehow failed to make her mine?

Narelle— We had a very nice seven-night stand in Perth, and still keep in touch as friends. She’s also a brilliant musician.

Sarah— I had the biggest, most ill-advised crush on her for ages. No, twice actually. What a voice. Mmmmm...

Roger— A geek who models his appearance on Jesus. He’s amazingly funny, and very good company.

Harry— I got outrageously drunk at his 30th birthday party. He’s another singer, but can’t decide whether his métier is to pursue excellence in music-making or beer-making.

Marabai— A fascinating redheaded femme fatale— well not quite, but someone told her about my thing for redheads, so she teases me sometimes.

Lisa— A soul-mate of sorts, the married to someone else sort. She is a radiographer, a good singer and makes nice homebrew.

Heloise— More red hair... a brilliant violinist and excellent percussionist.

Frank— Pianist and bass singer current collaborating on a piece called The Passion of Brian.

Kristina— The gorgeous new girl at work.

Ruth— The secretary at work. One of my friends said she would have been a babe when she was younger, and he was right, if her progeny are anything to go by... three spunks out of three. Even I can tell the boy is a hunka spunk.

Also my parents are still together and happy after 35 years, and I have three sisters: 2, 6 and 11 years younger than me.

Here’s an interesting entry I’ve been reading by .

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